28 Years Later

Monday, September 28th, 2009 at 1:09am

Not yet dead yet, but I certainly feel very zombie-like as of late.

It still feels weird saying it out loud. 28 years old. Egad. I wonder where I thought I would be today, ten years ago. At least now I’m smart enough not to ever predict where I’ll be when I’m 38. Just between you and me, I’ll be surprised if I make it that long.

All emo comments aside, this has actually been one of the best birthdays in a long, long time. If ever. Nothing mind-numbingly huge or jaw-droppingly shocking happened. Rather, just a string of really pleasant, smaller events with all the people that mean the most to me in my life right now.

Festivities began on Thursday, which is actually Jamie’s birthday. I took the day off work and the two of us went up to Disneyland. He hasn’t been to Disneyland since moving to CA, but had been to Disneyworld plenty of times. So there was a lot of compare and contrast happening. He called my castle small. Then I showed him the walk-through and told him the obvious: it’s all about how you use it.

The park was extremely empty. Everything we went on was quite literally walk on. Even Splash Mountain, and that just never happens. We ate lots of delicious and horrible foods. Most of our meals were covered in chili and/or cheese. Sadly, the Mansion and Space Mountain were closed. All the more reason to try and make this happen again sometime soon, right?

Friday was my actual birthday. I woke up to a half dozen texts and e-mails; birthday wishes from my friends around the globe, which is such a great way to start a birthday. I had to work, which was kind of unfortunate. I also had to *really* work, which was extra unfortunate. Friday was a huge deadline for something I’d been working on for weeks. I half-expected I’d be staying late, which would be extra-double-unfortunate, but I was able to leave work at a very decent hour.

I went to Disneyland with Tera. I had wanted to go into the park and ride the new Space Mountain, but the damn place was way over-packed. I didn’t even want to deal with it. We did a small bit of shopping for myself to spend my Disney gift card, but the most of the night was spent at ESPN Zone over beer and long islands. In that order. I haven’t seen her in far too long, so it was extra good to sit down at a table and have laughs with her.

Saturday.

I slept in like a motherfucker. It felt like I hadn’t done that in a month, so it was extra nice to shut the blinds and bury myself under my covers for as long as my eyes would let me. The bulk of the day was spent lounging around the house, eating meatball subs and watching a CSI: Miami marathon. Around 7, I left to go to Sarah’s for a little shindig at her place. Bianca’s birthday is Saturday, so there was some dual-celebrating going on. A few older familiar faces showed up, and it was good to see them again. There were also some people from the current Borders generation who I met for the first time.

Sarah kept pouring the drinks, and they were as absolutely delicious (and dangerous) as they always are when she’s bartending. It was a very low-key kind of night, with lots of laughs. Jumping from room to room, from conversation to conversation. At one point we played that game where you’re given a famous person’s name (fictional or real) and we try to guess who we are. I was sitting next to Sarah, which meant that she would be writing down the name and passing it to me. And her big book-worm smarts meant that I was sure to never guess who she gave me. But after someone finally slipped me the clue “The name of Morpheus’s ship in The Matrix,” I was the 2nd person to win.

The night kept going on, and I kept drinking. Around 4 in the morning the few people that were left slowly started to curl up and pass out. Sarah offered me a side in her magical bed, which I happily accepted. I’ve heard the stories from Charrmaine and Bianca about how comfy her bed is, and now I can totally say those stories were under exaggerated. I slept like a damn log. But that may also have a little something to do with the vodka. So much vodka.

The party was totally the highlight of the weekend for me. Sarah kept telling me she’s just out to make sure I have a good birthday, and she totally succeeded. I was completely comfortable, having fun with old and new friends, and just having a great time. She spoils me.

Sunday was a major recovery day. We didn’t get out of bed until 1030, and I was back home by 11, only to crawl back into bed and sleep away the headache. I put myself back together around 3, and headed over to the parent’s. We did our usual Sunday routine, with dinner at Boston’s. I got a $300 gift certificate to the Apple store from my parents, and $40 from Todd and Beth to but towards a Mac Mini. Excited to get that up and running. Todd and Beth also gave me a cute stuffed creature thing, whose name escapes me right now. But it’s super cute and goes great on my shelf with some of my other vinyl dolls. Didn’t get anything from Danny… 2nd year in a row. Oh well.

Tomorrow night, Sarah and I will be heading up to Irvine to see Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs in 3D IMAX. I’m pretty excited about the whole night.

I’ll be having lunch with Charrmaine and Jared on Tuesday. Charrmaine let me take her laptop home with me to clean it up and make it work nice and fast again. Jasmine also has me reserved for a dinner sometime in the coming week… I’m thinking Famous Dave’s again. So, I’ve still got little pockets of celebrating to do in the next week or so.

All of this leads to the sad conclusion that I really need to get my ass back on the treadmill and start eating better again. The party is over, gotta get back in gear. It will be done.

So, yeah. Definitely the best birthday I’ve had in such a long time. I really do love these friends of mine.

Goodnight Moon.
Dream On.

I Am An Exit

Wednesday, September 16th, 2009 at 1:29am

I still don’t know if nine inch nails has completely ended, or if it’s some many-year-long hiatus. Everyone is quick to say things like “No, that’s just what bands do. They’ll be back for the final-final goodbye shows in a year or two.” As much as I may sound like a rabid-fan-boy crying “no, not my band!”, I’m gonna cry out and say “No, not my band!”, all the same.

So for the last few days in August, when the “Wave Goodbye” tour started in New York, I followed online all the talk and happenings of the final shows. The second show into the tour Trent plays all of The Downward Spiral from start to finish. I remember reading that online and groaning aloud in a jealous, frustrated “god I wish i could have seen that!” Trent even made a point to say it’s something he’s always wanted to do live, and will never be done again.

I also read about the special guests Trent brings on stage each night. It’s starting to look like he’s got at least one solid surprise up his sleeve for each night of the show (Peter Murphy hung upside-down?!), which of course begs the question “What’s in store for the show I’m going to!?”

It was a half day at work for me. I drove home, picked up my brother, and then hit the road north to LA. It was all so casual to me. It was weird to me then, just as it’s weird to me now, but I didn’t really start to get excited until maybe an hour before the show started. Driving up to LA, finding the venue (where I previously saw Sylvia Browne years ago), stressing to find a place to park, getting the tickets from the box office, and waiting in line to be let in for almost 2 hours… I was just cool as a cucumber the whole time. It felt almost routine.

The two opening acts were bands I’d never heard of before. Queen Kwong (the only notable thing to say about them is the lead singer girl is super hot, and I rarely ever say that about girls), and Mew (who I could never, ever take seriously because they took themselves seriously enough for the lot of us).

Lights go dark, everyone rushes the stage and Todd and I turn on our cameras. Trent comes barreling down the center of the stage, strobe lights flashing, and so begins Mr. Self Destruct. Mosh pits, shoving, jumping. Fighting to stand still. First song ends, Piggy starts. It wasn’t until the end of the song, drowning in a sea of people singing “nothing can stop me now” along with Trent that I fully realized where I was. It hits me, just as Heresy starts… nothing quite like being surrounded by hundreds of people screaming “your god is dead.” I’m noticing a pattern, but don’t wanna say it out loud. Don’t want to jinx it.

I warn Todd, “Next song is probably going to be March of the Pigs. Hold on.” And it was, and we did. We were shoved around, pushed and pulled. It’s sometimes better to just go limp than to fight it. After Closer ended, and it jumped right into Ruiner I figured it was safe to say it: The Downward Spiral from start to finish… he’s doing it again. And I’m ecstatic.

Some of these songs I never in a million years thought I’d hear performed live. The crazy instrumental ones on the back-half of the album. Suddenly its 1995.

By the time Hurt ends its easily been an hour and a half, but they keep going.

Another hour later (of mostly old material, no less) Trent brings out Gary Numan. Together they perform Metal, and then Cars. I assumed that would be the end of it, but the show kept going on. The show ended with Head Like a Hole, fittingly the first song on his first album.

There was no encore. Just played straight through what had to be close to a 3 hour setlist.

1. Mr. Self Destruct
2. Piggy
3. Heresy
4. March of the Pigs
5. Closer
6. Ruiner
7. The Becoming
8. I Do Not Want This
9. Big Man With A Gun
10. A Warm Place
11. Eraser
12. Reptile
13. The Downward Spiral
14. Hurt
15. 1,000,000
16. Terrible Lie
17. Lights In The Sky
18. Burn
19. Gave Up
20. Suck
21. Metal
22. Cars
23. The Hand That Feeds
24. Head Like a Hole

When the lights came back on, Todd and I picked our jaws up off the floor and limped our way out and back to the car.

We got our asses handed to us, and we’d do it again in an instant.

I took over 140 pictures, and most of the turned out just like you would expect pictures from within a pit to turn out. The small handful of photos worth passing on can be found on my Flickr. Todd recorded a lot of video, and while the quality is pretty great, most of the audio is shot. Simply too loud for a tiny mic to handle. I might try to clean up a song or two and post it, but pretty much every angle of every song is already online somewhere.

It was my fourth time seeing nine inch nails live. I know it won’t be my last, but it’s going to be a very, very long time.

Goodnight Moon.
Oh, my precious whore.

My Girls

Sunday, September 13th, 2009 at 12:34am

Animal Collective – My Girls

There isn’t much that I feel I need
A solid soul and the blood I bleed
With a little girl, and by my spouse
I only want a proper house

I don’t care for fancy things
Or to take part in a pressured race.
But to provide for them when they ask
I will, with heart, on my father’s grave

On my father’s grave

I don’t mean
To seem like I care about material things,
Like the social stats
I just want
Four walls and adobe slabs
For my girls

Goodnight Moon.
I Miss You.

All Lined Up

Tuesday, September 8th, 2009 at 2:14am

I’ve got a big update coming down the pipes. Not just a followup to the NIN show I attended last Wednesday, but there seems to be some new girl-related gossip (or is it “new-girl related gossip”?) to try and talk very vaguely about, as I usually do when it comes to girls.

A lot going on in this old head of mine. Perhaps even more than I wish to discuss publicly at all. The longer Emily’s been out of town, the closer I’ve been to just spilling my guts to anyone who will listen. And that’s the quickest way to get in trouble.

As evidenced by what happened on Friday before I left work.

But that, too, will have to be a story for another night.

Until then…

Goodnight Moon.
I Love You.